SMS etiquette for mobile dating apps
Okay, so you’ve signed up for your mobile dating app, downloaded if for free, written the barest minimum in your profile without being overtly obvious – check, check, check. What next?
First of all, have a quick browse through potential victims eligible other singles and decide whether you want to contact them, or not. Hopefully, there will be many other singles looking for love online or perhaps a little something less committal if it’s a casual dating app like those found at m.BeNaughty or m.CheekyLovers that you’ve downloaded. Your call.
Well, that’s precisely the point of the next couple of posts – it probably won’t be a call in the first instance; more likely your first form of communication will be a private e-mail or an SMS message that you’re going to send to initiate contact.
Follow the rules of social and dating etiquette for SMS and mobile messages
Like everything in online dating, there is etiquette to follow – if you’re new to mobile dating, you may want to get your head around why you’re not getting as many responses as the dating site promised you would or messages back are disproportionate to the thousands of members ‘online now’, as the site suggests.
Just one little note about that – many casual dating sites are now so global, with membership numbers in millions rather than thousands, that you may have to extend your search to find results in the localised dating facility to see who’s up for a date near you, even if tens of thousands are showing online overall.
What most dating sites have started doing now, so that members don’t miss a trick even if they’re off-line and someone local to them sends them an e-mail or SMS, is send notification to that single’s mobile number so that they never miss the opportunity to hook up with someone local from their dating site app. This service is usually a free bolt-on once you’ve chosen and paid your subscription package.
Here are a few quick general tips about what is socially acceptable to send as SMS; we’ll look at e-mail in more detail (much of it worth incorporating into texting) in the next article:
• Many singles text when they think a call would be difficult; don’t fall into that trap. If it’s that important and you need an urgent response, call. Even if it means leaving a voice mail, your voice can stress an urgency that txt can’t; • There are certain circumstances when you wish you could call but it’s just not possible; if you can fire a quick text off, you may just be brightening someone’s day. A good rule to factor in here is – if it’s not worth talking about, don’t text it, either; • Be clear in your message. As we mentioned above, no stress can be imposed in text. Read through what you’re about to send and make sure the words relate the message you’re trying to get across and can’t be misconstrued in any other way. Your new partner may not know you well enough to pick up on humour, anger or other words which you use to communicate emotions; • Don’t start bombarding someone you’ve recently started dating with messages if you haven’t had a response within ten minutes of sending the last text. You’ve no idea what they’re up to. If they’re in a meeting and return to find twelve messages from you, that could well put them off for good… • …and in the same light, do not text private information. If you’re new dating partner is expecting a call but has an unavoidable meeting, they may leave their mobile in the care of someone who they would not want knowing the ins and outs of what they get up to outside of office hours.